Getting a Marriage License in California is not difficult. When get your marriage license you’ll be confronted with important choices. These choices affect how your personal information is captured and recorded for public use. Here are a few facts about California Marriage Licenses to help guide you toward your wedding day. Two Choices For Marriage Licenses The typical marriage license, issued in the State of California is a standard, one page document, purchased at any California County Clerk Recorder’s office. The document records necessary information about the couple getting married, the date of the marriage, the location, the individual Officiating the marriage, two spots for “witnesses” to sign, and a line to record the bride’s change of name. This document is “public.” Don’t worry, random citizens cannot access it. In fact, the newly married couple can’t even get a copy without a formal application and a fee. “Public” simply means the document can be obtained with the consent of those listed on the document. A random stranger cannot gain access to this information without your consent. The second type of marriage license issued in California is the Confidential Marriage License. Once recorded, this license cannot be accessed by anyone except for those whose names are on it. Likewise, the information found on the confidential license is kept from any public record. A significant difference between these two types of licenses is the handling of witnesses. Whereas the standard marriage license requires at least one signature of a witness (signature, printed name and personal address), the confidential license does not require a witness to sign. A confidential license must be signed by the bride and groom and the Officiant and then processed through the County Clerk’s office (who also signs it), but no witnesses’ signatures are required. Since there is no need for witnesses to sign a Confidential Marriage License, this type of license is ideal for elopements. The fee to obtain either a standard or confidential license is the same in the State of California. The County Clerk Recorder As was mentioned above the County Clerk Recorder’s office is the place where marriage licenses are issued and processed. The Clerk’s office is responsible for issuing marriage licenses, verifying them once they are returned, issuing edit requirements in the case of errors and inputting the demographic data found on the license into public record. The Clerk works with the Department of Public Health to maintain records relevant to marriages in each county. In order to receive a marriage license in the State of California, both parties must appear in person to the County Clerk Record’s office, present picture identification, pay the fee and complete the Clerk’s portions of the license including official names,...

Rolls Change Just because you can cook the perfect chicken casserole, iron the perfect shirt or cut the perfect lawn doesn’t mean you’re the best choice to manage your family’s money. Your roles might be specific but they don’t necessarily mean they’ll make your family money. Learn From Matt and Sarah Matt and Sarah just celebrated their 10 year anniversary. For most of that time Matt has managed their finances, just like his father always managed the money while he was growing up. It hasn’t always been stellar, but he’s pulled them through with mostly successful financial choices. The problem is, he’s typically stressed about their money. In fact, he took over the finances because he wasn’t sure Sarah was “cut out” for the job and he views money management as a manly thing . Matt brings some pretty major skills to their finances. He’s quick with numbers, he pays attention to details, he knows the need for a balanced check book and he pays the bills. It brings him a sense of pride to tell his friends and family that he takes care of the finances while Sarah takes care of other stuff. Sarah isn’t as excited about Matt’s money-role. She says that he is typically anxious about spending, irritated with the way she spends money and gloomy about future financial solvency. She thinks it’s time for him to be relieved of this duty and she is applying for the job of Family Finance Manager. Matt doesn’t think this is a good idea and the issue has escalated into a fight. Be Flexible Sometimes couples forget that just because one of them can cook better, add numbers better, or clean better, this means they should take on the roles that specifically use those skills. Sounds reasonable, right? Maybe not! Many people who can cook shouldn’t necessarily be chefs. Many people who can clean shouldn’t do all of the cleaning (seriously, no one person should have to clean all the toilets, all the time!). Just because you can do arithmetic in your head doesn’t mean you should manage the family’s money.  Why? Because having one skill related to an important task doesn’t mean you have the most important skills related to that task. (Don’t get down on yourself, I’m sure your kids will come to you with algebra problems.) It stands that reason that a person who loves to keep their car clean doesn’t necessarily like to keep their closet, bathroom or work shop clean. If the person who likes to clean also sees the value in keeping other spaces clean, then by all means put them in charge of cleaning duties around the house. However, if their need to clean...

Here Are 3 Ways To Include Religion Into Your Wedding Even If You Aren’t Religious It’s tough to get away from it: religion is a HUGE part of wedding ceremonies. There’s no way around it. Even if you want to avoid, ignore or disavow your beliefs from traditional beliefs espoused at weddings, it’ll be tough to do so. Besides, mom, dad and grandma might be offended if the biggest event of your life is lacking the religious-nod. Here are 3 Ways to include religious expression without offending your own beliefs: Music is the primary method of incorporating religious elaborations into your ceremony. You’ll need to pick music for the seating, the entrance, the processional, and the recessional at least. You might consider many of the religious, instrumental options out there. You can stream YouTube channels by the search title, “religious instrumental music.” You’ll find hours of music familiar to those who attend religious worship services. You can make them happy simply by playing some nice, instrumental tunes before the festivities begin. (If you’d like more to read regarding ceremony writing and preperation go here…) Readings may include poems, short stories, proverbs, and inspirational quotations. They almost always including religious writings from holy books. Depending on how the readings are prefaced, a somewhat ambiguous passage on love and relationships from the Bible, the Koran or Bhagavad Gita will elude to the marriage-beliefs of your relatives without making the entire ceremony about those beliefs. Prayers are another common way to incorporate religious history into the present experience. I know what you’re thinking, Prayers are the most religious thing you can think of! In actuality, prayers are a very touching way to include friends and family. A prayer is a brief communication of what a person hopes will happen. In the case of a wedding, most religious people will pray for blessings and good things to happen for the couple. How can that be bad? Contact: Ric...

Some ceremonies are amazing because of the vows. Others knock your socks off because of the food. Still other ceremonies are mind blowing because of the venue. Brittany and Darko’s elopement elevated wedding photography to a new level creating jaw-dropping images that will never leave our minds. Nestled, and I mean nestled in the mossy groves of Los Osos Nature Preserve, Brittany, Darko and their Officiant Ric, under the studied hand of photographer, Jonathan David brought, to life an almost mythical scene. . There, in the oak-fell-forest of the Valley of the Bears Brittany and Darko vowed to hold and keep one another forever; vows most certainly witnessed by fairies and dryads alike. In the words of E. E. Cummings, the words of their vows: I carry your heart with me, I carry it in my heart, I am never without it, Anywhere I go you go my dear; Contact: ...

At Olive Tree Officiating we obviously believe that the wedding is the beginning of something very big. We believe that the wedding ceremony is the starting gun for a new set of experiences that will move an individual’s life from black and white to high definition color. Not all people believe. 1-1=0 Your life will change when you get married but it should grow in all the positive ways. It will grow in love, curiosity, fulfillment and strength but you must be a positive part of the equation. Subtracting from you spouse’s joy will end badly for you both. How do spouses take away from each other’s martial potential? By being a drag, being slow to try new things, slow to pick up responsibilities and to get stuff done. Learning to work with your spouse is tough but necessary. You and they are not always willing. Why do marriages fail? Marriages fail when the two parties stop investing in the marriage and start investing in themselves. 1+0 will never equal 2 it can only equal 1. Check yourself before you start doing bad marital-math. 1+0=1 If you are an non-entity in the marriage than you are leaving the marriage worse than when you started. Neutrality is a false position. You have to invest in you intend for the marriage to succeed. Neutrality is not an option. It leads one spouse to determine that they are better off alone. The myth of neutrality says, “I can let my spouse live their life while I live my  life.” This is “1-1=0” thinking in disguise and it will net you nothing. Neutrality happens for two reasons: too many rigid expectations or not enough expectation sharing. If you have a lot of expectations about married-life be ready to let a few go. If you have no expectations get ready to man-up and make some decisions. 1+1=2 You’ve heard this I’m sure. It’s true. Consider this: in marriage two people share the expenses, the cooking, the cleaning and all the rest of the labor-activities you can think of. It’s that simple. Two people are stronger, smarter, faster, tougher and more calculated than one. The same is true emotionally: two people are more intuitive, more understanding and theoretically more loving than one. In life you will have adventure; a spouse will heighten that experience. In life you will have adversaries; who better than your spouse to protect you. Life is best lived together. The threat of a failed marriage can lead us to believe marriage just isn’t worth it. Think again. The math is simple: 1+1=2. 2 are always greater than 1.   Contact: Ric...

After living for years as single people, the newly wedded Todd and Jennifer Starkey were horrified to discover that marriage often times requires sharing. “This is no ordinary sharing!” said Mr. Starkey, his bride wincing at his side. “This is the kind of sharing that makes you want to just, I don’t know, walk out on the whole thing!” Mrs. Starkey seemed to be suffering from a kind of post-wedding-stress-disorder (PWSD). She held the upper portion of Mr. Starkey’s arm periodically shaking it like a tree limb throughout the entirety of the interview. “Had I known this was what marriage was all about, Todd and I probably would have kept our own places and just dated forever. Can you believe couples actually knowingly choose this kind of situation? It’s intolerable. And wrong!” said the beguiled bride. Marital sharing has been on the decline for decades. This lack of sharing has created an opposite effect among teens and pre-teens. Within this demographic, sharing with others is on the rise. A recent pole taken in the territory of Puerto Rico unearthed a trend among youngsters who are choosing to give away many of their belongings, having recognized their older, more selfish peers tend to horde possessions even when others may benefit from them. Christof Spielding, a prominent marriage psychologist and frequenter of the Single’s Bar said, “If marriage must be the inevitable end of your unmarried life then certain pre-nuptial agreements should be firmed up prior to signing on the ‘dotted line’.” The Single’s Bar is a popular hang out known for its rampant patronization by selfish, self indulgent, singles in their mid-thirties who hope never to marry. Dr. Spielding strongly urges all couples to have “a few things” they can keep to themselves even if they should choose to marry. “These things,” he says, “are the way by which an individual might assert and re-assert their autonomy” if the couple happens to disagree. “Making sure your significant other knows which objects in the home (i.e. closet space, vanity and/or specific chair) are ‘mine’ vs. ‘yours’ will bring a speedy end to most disagreements. Spielding went on to say that even in times when the couple is agreeing to share temporarily, writing the owner’s name with a Sharpie on various objects can help to clarify whose stuff is whose.   Contact: Ric...